Bartlett went on to add that the Disney FastPass service will be available in the new park, giving irritable visitors the opportunity to squabble over whether they wasted their no-wait ride selection too early in the day.
One of Ordeal Kingdom’s most popular attractions is expected to be Tarzan Adventure, a kid-friendly obstacle course that provides dozens of opportunities for parents to lose track of their children among twists and turns as they struggle to make their voices heard over loud jungle sound effects.
Officials noted that Ordeal Kingdom also features live shows on five different stages, each one tailored to appeal exclusively to one gender and age group, with all shows occurring simultaneously once per day during lunchtime. In addition, the property hosts a number of three-hour-long parades throughout the day that can be viewed from designated obstructed viewpoints.
Did they really? That’s crazy
Wait till you see the guys proposing on one knee get tackled by employees, fun for all.
Even when it is not happening live, hidden speakers constantly broadcast an acoustically perfect 'Now, Logan...Logan, what did we talk about? Logannnn...What did we talk about?' to make it seem like it's happening just out of sight and to make you feel better about your stuff.
I could've sworn that they already had that. My family went there all the time!
Crying about your parents divorce only allowed in designated crying areas
'Furthermore, sources confirmed that numerous Disney characters, all from the 1985 movie The Black Cauldron, would be wandering the park for visitors to meet and take photos with.' 💀
its called exit right here
Reports from the scene say it’s unbelievable and they can’t even have one nice day of vacation.
'The most aggravating elements of Disney’s other parks expanded into a creative & fully immersive world of irritation—the longest lines in the entire resort, a convoluted layout that is only depicted in indecipherable cartoon maps that are not to scale, & 150% higher prices.' 😂
Any chance we could do this with neighborhoods as well?
Hmm. Here I thought that was the entire park.
3pm is totally the witching hour for family breakdowns. My favorite is the irate dads who demand their kids have more fun when all they want is a nap.
Oh man, the lines are going to be around the block.
The world is my ordeal kingdom
Related: National Parks Service Hires Disney Imagineers To Replace Disappearing Endangered Species With Animatronic Versions
And a 7-11 for the smokes dad says he needs to buy and never returns.
Worth it if the churros are under $30